It’s been a month and I wrote you a song….

Good Morning Dad!

Well, it’s been a month since you continued on to spread beautiful energy around us.  I can feel you with me always. I sure miss you though.  And I can’t seem to talk to you without crying my eyes out.  But here I am.  Surviving.  Like I’m supposed to do.  Thanks for teaching me how to survive in this crazy world.  And really, thanks for teaching me how to survive like a CHAMP.  I mean, you don’t get all the credit…..mom gets at least 50%.  Although y’all divorced a million years ago, you know how awesome she is.  She’s been amazing through all of this (AND, she just sold her house and bought a new one and still manages to be available 24/7 for me.  GO MOM!).

I made it to the Woody Guthrie festival this past weekend and really enjoyed it, dad.  It felt impossible at first.  I think I was just overwhelmed with the LOVE from my most fantastic music community.  Thank you MUSIC COMMUNITY.  There’s no way I could do this without you.  Seriously.  I am blessed and it never goes unrecognized.  You met a whole lot of these folks, but I sure wish you could have met them all.  They are a shining light in my life.  They shine like you did…..like you do.  I wrote you a song and it was the first one I sang at the festival. I felt like throwing up when I stepped onto the stage.  I was pretty sure I would just cry out my songs.  You must’ve given me strength though, because I made it through and managed to have a good time.  You were with me, dad.  Thank you.  I made a crappy video of the song, but wanted to share it because it represents my reemergence into music again.  Playing music helped me feel human again.  So I’m back in the saddle!  Watch out world!  I’m going to write A LOT of SAD songs!

Danny and I left Okemah, OK (home town of Woody Guthrie) and hauled ass to Denver where we surprised Danny’s mom for her 70th birthday!  OMG.  It was the best.  You would have loved it, dad. To be honest, it wasn’t a surprise.  Donna already knew (but she shrieked and smiled so big it must have hurt her face).  We didn’t think she knew, but after much talking, she couldn’t keep it in any longer.  It’s a long story how she found out, but man is she sneaky.  We’ve been celebrating since Sunday!  Headed back home tomorrow to get back into our lives in Austin, but this has been a time of JOY for us.  Being with the Schmidt’s is so healing.  Please know I’m taken care of, dad.  This family has wrapped me up tight and hugged me so hard.  I’m so lucky (I’m sure I’ve said that like a million times, but it can’t be stated enough). Here’s a photo of the birthday girl and family  just before we went paddle boating on Evergreen Lake…..

donna's birthday

On the craft front, I’ve been embroidering like crazy….see…..

I am
For Telisha
do epic shit
For Annie
damn it feels good
For Jo

I’ve been thinking about volunteering for hospice, dad.  The things happening in my life seem so insignificant after spending that month with you.  I mean, I’m appreciating all these moments and I feel present with my friends and family, but nothing compares to the feeling I had when caring for you.  I do realize you were an exceptional patient, but still, I’d like to help others.  AND, I’d love to help people navigate through some of the business stuff, too.  It’s SO CONFUSING and I’ve learned so much about it all.  So please send that out to the world…..to those folks in need…..I’m here to help in any way I can.

And to end this post, here’s the final photo before they took you away.  I can’t believe it’s been a month.  Wish I could hear your voice.  I miss it so much.

IMG_3580e

I love you, dad.  I promise to write soon.

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2 thoughts on “It’s been a month and I wrote you a song….

  1. Dear Carrie,
    My heart goes out to you. Freddie sent me this and it was the only way I could find to reach out to you. I want you to know when we heard we were all devistated. A rush of tears, a rush of memories and a rush of regret for not staying in touch. I hope you know how much we think of you all. I sit here typing tearing up and remember all of the great times we had with you, Rick & your dad in Eagles. You are correct he had to be the best dad in the entire world. He treated everyone like they were the most important person in the world and always with that smile and light in his eyes. Please give my love to Rick. I looked at some old pictures from some our trips and cried and laughed all at the same time. Please take care.
    Love,
    Lucy Lambert (Mrs. Lucy)

    Like

  2. Lucy,

    Sorry it’s taken me a bit of time to respond. I just want to thank you for your thoughtful message. I think of you guys all the time, too! SO many beautiful memories from my childhood. My dad truly loved y’all.

    I hope all is well with you. Please send my love to the family. xo

    Like

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